If the Queen Isn't Happy, No One Is

Puravida Fitness • February 13, 2024

If the Queen Isn't Happy, No One Is

A silhouette of a woman raising her fist in the air at sunset.

When I was a kid, there were several things around the house we just did. If you ate the last pop-tart, you wrote it on the grocery list. If something fell to the floor, you picked it up. Coats went on the hooks, not on the table. When you drove dad's car, you put the seat all the way back before you got out. You replaced the gas before bringing the car home. If mom was napping on the couch, everything could wait. When you left the table, you pushed in the chair. Dishes went straight to the dishwasher, not the sink... Etc.etc. etc.


Back then these things felt like rules. They probably had to be or they wouldn't have gotten done.


Now I see the logic. Common sense. Everybody pitches in. Little things go a long way... especially for those who are running the ship.


At some point along the way, my mom came across a saying that has stuck with our family: If the Queen isn't happy, no one is.


Maybe you can relate.


Moms have a tendency to put everyone else's needs before their own. They take time for themselves after all the kids are taken to their activities or appointments, meals are cooked, laundry is done, errands are run and the dog is walked. For many, that's about 10 minutes before bed because exhaustion sets in. It might even be less if sick kids or job stress is added to the mix. 5 minutes peace would be a gift!


Whenever I find myself in that boat, I check my SELF CARE. What kinds of things am I doing to take care of myself? If I'm feeling overwhelmed, chances are the SELF CARE dial if way off.


And sometimes reminders come via email.


Last week a SELF CARE CHECK IN showed up in my inbox. Designed by the Passion Planner Team, I figured there was a reason it appeared, so I checked it out. There were several areas to reflect upon:


  • A movie you love
  • A satisfying meal
  • A hobby you enjoy
  • A grounding habit
  • A form of exercise or movement
  • A comforting song
  • 5 affirmations that resonate with you
  • Your biggest strength and how it can be used
  • Who or what makes your life meaningful and why


It also included a SELF CARE REFLECTION. This pinpoints some feelings and the importance of taking care of yourself. I found it to be useful and the timing was perfect.


Several years ago, my mom gifted us with a small picture frame she designed herself. Each contained the message It's Good To Be Queen. All of us, including her, have placed it where we can see it daily. For me it's one of many reminders to take care of myself so I can take care of others.


Is exercise a form of self care for you? Do you have a plan to keep you motivated and without injury? Is good nutrition a form of self care for you? Do you have a program to follow and a coach to keep you accountable? If not, click the blue button below and let's chat!


We've helped hundreds of people transform their lives by making exercise and nutrition part of their self care routine.


Let us help you feel like a queen!


Tracy Farrell

September 29, 2026
Back at my old job, I used to take yoga classes. One instructor said something that stuck with me: despite years of yoga, he could never seem to make his hamstrings more flexible. At the time, that sounded strange. Like most people, I had been taught that if a muscle feels tight, the answer is to stretch it more. But what if there is more to flexibility than stretching? The training that changed how I coach In 2010, I was introduced to Z-Health, a brain-based approach to movement. Some of the drills looked almost too simple, yet I saw people move better after doing them. I enrolled in two certification courses, and what I learned changed how I program workouts and help clients. The idea that stayed with me was that movement depends on communication between the brain and the body. When a joint feels uncomfortable or a movement feels threatening, people may tense up or guard that area. Repeating a stretch alone may not address what is limiting the movement. Today, I look beyond the spot that feels tight. I pay attention to how the joints move, how a client responds to a drill, and whether that drill helps them feel and move better. What works for one person may not work for another. Here are four lessons I use in my coaching: A tight muscle may be doing more than resisting a stretch. Discomfort or a sense of instability can change how a person moves and recruits muscles. Joint movement matters. Improving how a joint moves can sometimes make an exercise feel stronger or more comfortable. The nervous system is part of flexibility. How safe and controlled a movement feels may affect how much range of motion a person can use. Test, then retest. We try an appropriate drill, check how the movement feels afterward, and adjust the plan based on the response. Stretching can still be useful. I simply don’t assume it is the only answer every time someone feels stiff. What this looks like in a session Just today, I worked with a woman who came in dealing with a significant low back issue. We used gentle movement drills rather than stretching her back. By the end of the session, her range of motion had improved, and she said she felt and moved better than when she arrived. That is one person’s experience, not a promise that the same drills will resolve every back problem. It is a reminder of why I assess each client and pay attention to their response instead of handing everyone the same flexibility routine. The transformation closest to my heart My dad showed me what better movement can mean outside the gym. At 80, he had back surgery and became so weak afterward that he needed a walker. Hunting was one of his passions, and it looked as though he might lose the independence to do it. We worked on rebuilding his movement and strength using the principles I had learned. That October, he was walking with a walker. By April, he was hiking in the Black Hills, where he shot a wild turkey and even crawled under a fence to retrieve it. You can watch my dad’s story here . Mobility is about living your life At Puravida Fitness, our tagline is “Transforming Bodies and Lives.” Sometimes that means losing weight or building muscle. Sometimes it means having the strength, flexibility, and mobility to keep doing the things you love. Those are some of my favorite transformations. Helping someone move with more confidence, regain independence, or return to a favorite activity is about quality of life and longevity. To me, that is priceless. If you’re looking for a personal trainer who considers the whole person, we’d love to help. Puravida Fitness is a gym and health club in Lakeville focused on fitness and wellness for real life. We work with people from Farmington, Prior Lake, Burnsville, Apple Valley, Savage, New Market, and Elko. Learn more about Puravida Fitness .
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